Let’s start with the breaking news: the latest NHTSA complaint for the Cybertruck is deeply concerning for both Tesla drivers and everybody sharing the road with them:
Here’s the link and a screen grab for posterity:
What’s Going on With Cybertruck’s FSD?
So, because we’re a very not-serious news publication, I feel the need to point out a few pieces of background information:
Tesla’s Full Self Driving on the Cybertruck has tech issues
- FSD has a number of issues, particularly on the Cybertruck. It can’t reliably detect child-sized obstacles, for instance.
- FSD was redesigned in March 2024 to rely on a black-box AI system that they market as “End-to-End Neural Link AI,” as opposed to its prior configuration of being manually updated by programmers.
- While AI-based systems can deploy magnificent capabilities (especially for increasing stock prices), they are not yet reliable, known to flub even the simplest of problem-solving tasks.
Tesla is Attacking the Government Agency That Would Fix the Tech Issues
- The NHTSA opened a probe into unexplained self-driving related accidents and fatalities in Tesla vehicles on January 6th 2025.
- Less than a month later, Elon Musk’s Department of Government Efficiency (D.O.G.E.) executed what looks like a hostile takeover of the US government’s HR department, the Office of Personnel Management (OPM). The OPM invited federal employees to quit before facing downsizing or firing, in language mirroring Musk’s gutting of Twitter.
- The NHTSA is impacted by that downsizing.
A more serious journalist than me can probably connect these dots better… so watch this space!
The Cybertruck Is Getting Less Funny By the Minute
Honestly, I started covering the Cybertruck mostly as a joke. As a pickup truck driver, I thought the vehicle was funny, in the same way gear heads like to laugh about the Pontiac Aztek or the Edsel.
This NHTSA complaint, combined with the fire deaths, have cemented my view: the Cybertruck isn’t funny anymore.
We’re a comedy publication, so here is what Elon Musk is saying on X Live about FSD in January 2025: Tesla’s self-driving technology will be better than a human driver in 3 months time, and 10x safer “in due time.”
That is, of course, ignoring the fact that Waymo is 12x+ safer today.
